Chapter 13

FAILURES

The very title of this chapter may perhaps startle some. "Failures," they willsay; "we thought there were no failures in this life of faith!"

     To this I would answer that there ought notto be, and need not be; but, as a fact, there sometimes are. And we have got todeal with facts, and not with theories. No teacher of this interior life eversays that it becomes impossible to sin; they only insist that sin ceases to bea necessity, and that a possibility of uniform victory is opened before us. Andthere are very few who do not confess that, as to their own actual experience,they have at times been overcome by momentary temptation.

     Of course, in speaking of sin here, I meanconscious, known sin. I do not touch on the subject of sins of ignorance, orwhat is called the inevitable sin of our nature, which are all covered by theatonement, and do not disturb our fellowship with God. I have no desire norability to treat of the doctrines concerning sin; these I will leave with thetheologians to discuss and settle, while I speak only of the believer'sexperience in the matter. And I wish it to be fully understood that in all Ishall say, I have reference simply to that which comes within the range of ourconsciousness.

     Misunderstanding, then, on this point of known orconscious sin, opens the way for great dangers in the higher Christian life.When a believer, who has, as he trusts, entered upon the highway of holiness,finds himself surprised into sin, he is tempted either to be utterlydiscouraged, and to give everything up as lost; or else, in order to preservethe doctrine untouched, he feels it necessary to cover his sin up, calling itinfirmity, and refusing to be honest and above-board about it. Either of thesecourses is equally fatal to any real growth and progress in the life ofholiness. The only way is to face the sad fact at once, call the thing by itsright name, and discover, if possible, the reason and the remedy. This life ofunion with God requires the utmost honesty with Him and with ourselves. Thecommunion which the sin itself would only momentarily disturb, is sure to belost by any dishonest dealing with it. A sudden failure is no reason for beingdiscouraged and giving up all as lost. Neither is the integrity of our doctrinetouched by it. We are not preaching a state, but a walk. The highway ofholiness is not a place, but a way. Sanctification is not a thing to be pickedup at a certain stage of our experience, and forever after possessed, but it isa life to be lived day by day, and hour by hour. We may for a moment turn asidefrom a path, but the path is not obliterated by our wandering, and can beinstantly regained. And in this life and walk of faith, there may be momentaryfailures, which, although very sad and greatly to be deplored, need not, ifrightly met, disturb the attitude of the soul as to entire consecration andperfect trust, nor interrupt, for more than the passing moment, its happycommunion with its Lord.

     The great point is an instant return to God. Oursin is no reason for ceasing to trust, but only an unanswerable argument why wemust trust more fully than ever. From whatever cause we have been betrayed intofailure, it is very certain that there is no remedy to be found for it indiscouragement. As well might a child who is learning to walk, lie down indespair when he has fallen, and refuse to take another step; as a believer, whois seeking to learn how to live and walk by faith, give up in despair becauseof having fallen into sin. The only way in both cases is to get right up andtry again. When the children of Israel had met with that disastrous defeat,soon after their entrance into the land, before the little city of Ai, theywere all so utterly discouraged that we read:

     "Wherefore the hearts of the people melted, andbecame as water. And Joshua rent his clothes, and fell to the earth upon hisface before the ark of the Lord until the eventide, he and the elders ofIsrael, and put dust upon their heads. And Joshua said, Alas! O Lord God,wherefore hast Thou at all brought this people over Jordan to deliver us intothe hands of the Amorites to destroy us? Would to God we had been content, anddwelt on the other side Jordan! O Lord, what shall I say, when Israel turneththeir backs before their enemies? For the Canaanites and all the inhabitants ofthe land shall hear of it, and shall environ us round and cut off our name fromthe earth: and what wilt Thou do unto Thy great name?"

     What a wail of despair this was! And how exactlyit is repeated by many a child of God in the present day, whose heart, becauseof a defeat, melts and becomes as water, and who cries out, "Would to God wehad been content and dwelt on the other side Jordan!" and predicts for itselffurther failures and even utter discomfiture before its enemies. No doubtJoshua thought then, as we are apt to think now, that discouragement anddespair were the only proper and safe condition after such a failure. But Godthought otherwise. "And the Lord said unto Joshua, Get thee up; wherefore liestthou upon thy face?"

     The proper thing to do was not to abandonthemselves thus to utter discouragement, humble as it might look, but at onceto face the evil and get rid of it, and afresh and immediately to "sanctifythemselves." "Up, sanctify the people," is always God's command. "Lie down andbe discouraged," is always the enemy's temptation. Our feeling is that it ispresumptuous, and even almost impertinent, to go at once to the Lord, afterhaving sinned against Him. It seems as if we ought to suffer the consequencesour sin first for a little while, and endure the accusings of our conscience.And we can hardly believe that the Lord can be willing at once to receive usback into loving fellowship with Himself.

     A little girl once expressed the feeling to me,with a child's outspoken candor. She had asked whether the Lord Jesus alwaysforgave us for our sins as soon as we asked Him, and I had said, "Yes, ofcourse He does." "Just as soon" she repeated, doubtingly. "Yes," I replied,"the very minute we ask, He forgives us." "Well," she said deliberately, "Icannot believe that. I should think He would make us feel sorry for two orthree days first. And then I should think He would make us ask Him a great manytimes, and in a very pretty way too, not just in common talk. And I believethat is the way He does, and you need not try to make me think He forgives meright at once, no matter what the Bible says." She only said what mostChristians think, and, what is worse, what most Christians act on, making theirdiscouragement and their very remorse separate them infinitely further off fromGod than their sin would have done. Yet it is so totally contrary to the way welike our children to act towards us, that I wonder how we ever could haveconceived such an idea of God. How a mother grieves when a naughty child goesoff alone in despairing remorse, and doubts her willingness to forgive; andhow, on the other hand, her whole heart goes out in welcoming love to thedarling who runs to her at once and begs her forgiveness! Surely our God knewthis yearning love when He said to us, "Return, ye backsliding children, and Iwill heal your backslidings."

     The fact is, that the same moment which bringsthe consciousness of having sinned, ought to bring also the consciousness ofbeing forgiven. This is especially essential to an unwavering walk in thehighway of holiness, for no separation from God can be tolerated here for aninstant.

     We can only walk in this path by lookingcontinually unto Jesus, moment by moment; and if our eyes are taken off of Himto look upon our own sin and our own weakness, we shall leave the path at once.The believer, therefore, who has, as he trusts, entered upon this highway, ifhe finds himself overcome by sin, must flee with it instantly to the Lord. Hemust act on 1 John 1:9: "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just toforgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." He must nothide his sin and seek to salve it over with excuses, or to push it out of hismemory by the lapse of time. But he must do as the children of Israel did, riseup "early in the morning," and "run" to the place where the evil thing ishidden, and take it out of its hiding-place, and lay it "out before the Lord."He must confess his sin. And then he must stone it with stones, and burn itwith fire, and utterly put it away from him, and raise over it a great heap ofstones, that it may be forever hidden from his sight. And he must believe, thenand there, that God is, according to His word, faithful and just to forgive himhis sin, and that He does do it; and further, that He also cleanses him fromall unrighteousness. He must claim an immediate forgiveness and an immediatecleansing by faith, and must go on trusting harder and more absolutely thanever.

     As soon as Israel's sin had been brought to lightand put away, at once God's word came again in a message of gloriousencouragement, "Fear not, neither be thou dismayed . . . See, I have given intothy hand the king of Ai, and his people, and his city, and his land." Ourcourage must rise higher than ever, and we must abandon ourselves morecompletely to the Lord, that His mighty power may the more perfectly work in usall the good pleasure of His will. Moreover, we must forget our sin as soon asit is thus confessed and forgiven. We must not dwell on it, and examine it, andindulge in a luxury of distress and remorse. We must not put it on a pedestal,and then walk around it and view it on every side, and so magnify it into amountain that hides our God from our eyes. We must follow the example of Paul,and "forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto thosethings which are before," we must "press toward the mark for the prize of thehigh calling of God in Christ Jesus."

     I would like to bring up two contrastiveillustrations of these things. One was an earnest Christian man, an activeworker in the Church, who had been living for several months in the enjoymentof full salvation. He was suddenly overcome by a temptation to treat a brotherunkindly. Not having supposed it possible that he could ever sin again, he wasat once plunged into the deepest discouragement, and concluded he had beenaltogether mistaken, and had never entered into the life of full trust at all.Day by day his discouragement increased, until it became despair, and heconcluded he had never even been born again, and gave himself up for lost. Hespent three years of utter misery, going further and further away from God, andbeing gradually drawn off into one sin after another, until his life was acurse to himself and to all around him. His health failed under the terribleburden, and fears were entertained for his reason.

     At the end of three years he met a Christianlady, who understood the truth about sin that I have been trying to explain. Ina few moments' conversation she found out his trouble, and at once said, "Yousinned in that act, there is no doubt about it, and I do not want you to tryand excuse it. But have you never confessed it to the Lord and asked Him toforgive you?" "Confessed it!" he exclaimed, "why it seems to me I have donenothing but confess it, and entreat God to forgive me night and day for allthese three dreadful years." "And you have never believed He did forgive you?"asked the lady. "No," said the poor man, "how could I, for I never felt as ifHe did?" "But suppose He had said He forgave you, would not that have done aswell as for you to feel it?" "Oh, yes," replied the man, "if God said it, ofcourse I would believe it." "Very well, He does say so," was the lady's answer,and she turned to the verse we have taken above 1 John 1:9) and read it aloud."Now," she continued, "you have been all these three years confessing andconfessing your sin, and all the while God's record has been declaring that Hewas faithful and just to forgive it and to cleanse you, and yet you have neveronce believed it. You have been `making God a liar' all this while by refusingto believe His record."

     The poor man saw the whole thing, and was dumbwith amazement and consternation; and when the lady proposed they should kneeldown, and that he should confess his past unbelief and sin, and should claim,then and there, a present forgiveness and a present cleansing, he obeyed likeone in a maze. But the result was glorious. In a few moments the light brokein, and he burst out into praise at the wonderful deliverance. In three minuteshis soul was enabled to traverse back by faith the whole long weary journeythat he had been three years in making, and he found himself once more restingin Jesus, and rejoicing in the fulness of His salvation.

     The other illustration was the case of aChristian lady who had been living in the land of promise about two weeks, andwho had had a very bright and victorious experience. Suddenly, at the end ofthat time, she was overcome by a violent burst of anger. For a moment a floodof discouragement swept over her soul. The enemy said, "There, now, that showsit was all a mistake. Of course you have been deceived about the whole thing,and have never entered into the life of full trust at all. And now you may aswell give up altogether, for you never can consecrate yourself any moreentirely, nor trust any more fully, than you did this time; so it is very plainthis life of holiness is not for you!" These thoughts flashed through her mindin a moment, but she was well taught in the ways of God, and she said at once,"Yes, I have sinned, and it is very sad. But the Bible says that if we confessour sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse usfrom all unrighteousness, and I believe He will do it."

     She did not delay a moment, but while stillboiling over with anger, she ran, she could not walk, into a room where shecould be alone, and kneeling down beside the bed, she said, "Lord, I confess mysin. I have sinned, I am even at this very moment sinning. I hate it, but Icannot get rid of it. I confess it with shame and confusion of face to Thee.And now I believe that, according to Thy word, Thou dost forgive and Thou dostcleanse." She said it out loud, for the inward turmoil was too great for it tobe said inside. As the words "Thou dost forgive and Thou dost cleanse" passedher lips, the deliverance came. The Lord said, "Peace, be still," and there wasa great calm. A flood of light and joy burst on her soul, the enemy fled, andshe was more than conqueror through Him that loved her. The whole thing, thesin and the recovery from it, had occupied not five minutes, and her feet trodon more firmly than ever in the blessed highway of holiness. Thus the valley ofAchor became to her a door of hope, and she sang afresh and with deeper meaningher song of deliverance, "I will sing unto the Lord, for He hath triumphedgloriously."

     The truth is, the only remedy, after all in everyemergency, is to trust in the Lord. And if this is all we ought to do, and allwe can do, is it not better to do it at once? I have often been brought upshort by the question, "Well, what can I do but trust?" And I have realized atonce the folly of seeking for deliverance in any other way, by saying tomyself, "I shall have to come to simple trusting in the end, and why not cometo it at once now in the beginning?" It is a life and walk of faith we haveentered upon, and if we fail in it our only recovery must lie in an increase offaith, not in a lessening of it.

     Let every failure, then, if any occur, drive youinstantly to the Lord, with a more complete abandonment and a more perfecttrust; and you will find that, sad as they are, they will not take you out ofthe land of rest, nor permanently interrupt your sweet communion with Him.

     And now, having shown the way of deliverance fromfailure, I want to say a little as to the causes of failure in this life offull salvation. The causes do not lie in the strength of the temptation nor inour own weakness, nor, above all, in any lack in the power or willingness ofour Saviour to save us. The promise to Israel was positive, "There shall notany man be able to stand before thee all the days of thy life." And the promiseto us is equally positive. "God is faithful, who will not suffer you to betempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way ofescape that ye may be able to bear it."

     The men of Ai were "but few," and yet the peoplewho had conquered the mighty Jericho "fled before the men of Ai." It was notthe strength of their enemy, neither had God failed them. The cause of theirdefeat lay somewhere else, and the Lord Himself declares it, "Israel hathsinned, and they have also transgressed my covenant which I commanded them; forthey have even taken of the accursed thing, and have also stolen and dissembledalso, and they have put it even among their own stuff. Therefore the childrenof Israel could not stand before their enemies, but turned their backs upontheir enemies." It was a hidden evil that conquered them. Deep down under theearth, in an obscure tent in that vast army, was hidden something against whichGod had a controversy, and this little hidden thing made the whole armyhelpless before their enemies. "There is an accursed thing in the midst ofthee, O Israel; thou canst not stand before thine enemies until ye take awaythe accursed thing from among you."

     The teaching here is simply this, that anythingallowed in the heart which is contrary to the will of God, let it seem ever soinsignificant, or be ever so deeply hidden, will cause us to fall before ourenemies. Any root of bitterness cherished towards another, any self-seeking andharsh judgments indulged in, any slackness in obeying the voice of the Lord,any doubtful habits or surroundings, any one of these things will effectuallycripple and paralyze our spiritual life. We may have hidden the evil in themost remote corner of our hearts, and may have covered it over from our sight,refusing even to recognize its existence, of which, however, we cannot helpbeing all the time secretly aware. We may steadily ignore it, and persist indeclarations of consecration and full trust, we may be more earnest than everin our religious duties, and have the eyes of our understanding opened more andmore to the truth and the beauty of the life and walk of faith. We may seem toourselves and to others to have reached an almost impregnable position ofvictory, and yet we may find ourselves suffering bitter defeats. We may wonder,and question, and despair, and pray; nothing will do any good until theaccursed thing is dug up from its hiding-place, brought out to the light, andlaid before God. And the moment a believer who is walking in this interior lifemeets with a defeat, he must at once seek for the cause not in the strength ofthat particular enemy, but in something behind, some hidden want ofconsecration lying at the very centre of his being. Just as a headache is notthe disease itself, but only a symptom of a disease situated in some other partof the body, so the sin in such a Christian is only the symptom of an evilhidden probably in a very different part of his being.

     Sometimes the evil may be hidden even in that,which at a cursory glance, would look like good. Beneath apparent zeal for thetruth, may be hidden a judging spirit, or a subtle leaning to our ownunderstanding. Beneath apparent Christian faithfulness, may be hidden anabsence of Christian love. Beneath an apparently rightful care for our affairs,may be hidden a great want of trust in God. I believe our blessed Guide, theindwelling Holy Spirit, is always secretly discovering these things to us bycontinual little twinges and pangs of conscience, so that we are left withoutexcuse. But it is very easy to disregard His gentle voice, and insist upon itto ourselves that all is right; and thus the fatal evil will continue hidden inour midst causing defeat in most unexpected quarters.

     A capital illustration of this occurred to meonce in my housekeeping. I had moved into a new house and, in looking over itto see if it was all ready for occupancy, I noticed in the cellar a veryclean-looking cider-cask headed up at both ends. I debated with myself whetherI should have it taken out of the cellar and opened to see what was in it, butconcluded, as it seemed empty and looked nice, to leave it undisturbed,especially as it would have been quite a piece of work to get it up the stairs.I did not feel quite easy, but reasoned away my scruples and left it. Everyspring and fall, when house-cleaning time came on, I would remember that cask,with a little twinge of my housewifely conscience, feeling that I could notquite rest in the thought of a perfectly cleaned house, while it remainedunopened, for how did I know but under its fair exterior it contained somehidden evil. Still I managed to quiet my scruples on the subject, thinkingalways of the trouble it would involve to investigate it; and for two or threeyears the innocent-looking cask stood quietly in my cellar.

     Then, most unaccountably, moths began to fill myhouse. I used every possible precaution against them, and made every effort toeradicate them, but in vain. They increased rapidly and threatened to ruineverything I had. I suspected my carpets as being the cause, and subjected themto a thorough cleaning. I suspected my furniture, and had it newly upholstered.I suspected all sorts of impossible things. At last the thought of the caskflashed on me. At once I had it brought up out of the cellar and the headknocked in, and I think it is safe to say that thousands of moths poured out.The previous occupant of the house must have headed it up with something in itwhich bred moths, and this was the cause of all my trouble.

     Now I believe that, in the same way, someinnocent-looking habit or indulgence, some apparently unimportant and safething, about which we yet have now and then little twinges of conscience,something which is not brought out fairly into the light, and investigatedunder the searching eye of God, lies at the root of most of the failure in thishigher life. All is not given up. Some secret corner is kept locked against theentrance of the Lord. And therefore we cannot stand before our enemies, butfind ourselves smitten down in their presence.

     In order to prevent failure, or to discover itscause if we have failed, it is necessary that we should keep continually beforeus this prayer, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know mythoughts; and see if there be any evil way in me, and lead me in the wayeverlasting."

     There may be something very deceptive in oursufferings over our failures. We may seem to ourselves to be wholly occupiedwith the glory of God, and yet in our inmost souls it may be self alone thatoccasions all our trouble. Our self-love is touched in a tender spot by thediscovery that we are not so saintly as we thought we were; and this chagrin isoften a greater sin than the original fault itself.

     The only safe way to treat our failures isneither to justify nor condemn ourselves on account of them, but to lay themquietly and in simplicity before the Lord, looking at them in peace and in thespirit of love.

     All the old mystic writers tell us that ourprogress is aided far more by a simple, peaceful turning to God, than by allour chagrin and remorse over our lapses from Him. Only be faithful, they say,in turning quietly to Him alone, the moment you perceive what you have done,and His presence will deliver you from the snares which have entrapped you. Tolook at self plunges you deeper into the slough, for this very slough is afterall nothing but self; while the gentlest look towards God will calm and deliveryour heart.

     Finally, let us never forget for one moment, nomatter how often we may fail, that the Lord Jesus able, according to thedeclaration concerning Him, to deliver us out of the hands of our enemies, thatwe may "serve Him without fear, in holiness and righteousness before Him allthe days of our life."

     Let us then pray, every one of us, day and night,"Lord, keep us from sinning, and make us living witnesses of Thy mighty powerto save to the uttermost"; and let us never be satisfied until we are sopliable in His hands, and have learned so to trust Him, that He will be able to"make us perfect, in every good work to do His will, working in us that whichis well-pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ; to whom be glory for everand ever. Amen."

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